Loneliness and Isolation…

I recently came across this lovely Blogger, who like me, is new to the blogging world.  She goes by the name of ‘notalone’ https://notalone832.wordpress.com/

I was touched by her heartfelt posts, reaching out to connect with others and to be an encouragement to others.

If you have the chance and are so inclined, please visit her Blog and say ‘hello’. I hope you don’t mind me sharing your Blog, ‘notalone’. 🙂

I also have felt the ache of loneliness and even being alone in a crowd or amongst friends, and know that many others have felt similar things also.

I have been encouraged from ‘day 1’ of blogging here by the feeling of community and connection that sharing our thoughts and a glimpse into our individual worlds brings.

I wonder if you have any suggestions as to what can help someone feeling this way? What healthy ways of coping with loneliness do you have?

I believe that God cares for us and that ultimately we always have SomeOne to reach out to. But it’s not always easy to feel or believe that. We need human companionship too.

But what happens when that is not available?

I think in addition to reaching out to God (for me, personally), we need to learn to be our own best friend, when too often we can be our own worst enemies. The thoughts we think about ourselves really do have such a powerful impact, not only on the state of our mind, but also on our mood, physical and emotional health and our ability to cope with the day to day things of life.

I would encourage you, if you are feeling alone and isolated to think about what might help you.

Here are some things that have helped me. I’d love to know what works for you, so please feel free to respond in the comments.

Much love. x

• Prayer and reaching out to God.
• Connecting with friends and family where possible – whether face to face, by telephone or via email, etc.
• Positive self talk.
• Making connections in safe ways on the online world.
• Thinking of how I can help other people and reaching out to people in need / being an encourager.
• Absorbing myself in a hobby.
• Going outside for a long walk.
• ‘Journalling’ / writing down my thoughts and ‘to do’ lists to keep productive.
• Focusing on ‘self care’ and building myself up to be independent and resilient emotionally.

When I am in a ‘good place’ within myself, I also find solitude immensely satisfying, especially being out in nature – so there is a difference between being physically alone and being lonely….we just need to find the healthy balance and manage our feelings along the way.

Let me know what works for you, if you so wish. Oh, and say ‘hi’ to my new friend over at Blogger.

Lost and Found

 

Daily Prompt – Trace

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I trace the contours of the moon with my eyes. I once thought she was my ‘guiding light’, but I was so lost then. I cried out to You, but the skies were sealed to my desperate pleas. Muffled in silence I quietly wept. The despair was potent in the mere thought that there could be life without You.

People came and went, not caring. They didn’t need the moon, nor You or anything beyond that real and solid thing in front of them there, in that moment. I would rather die. Or be as if I had never been. I was suffocating, desperately longing, but You were not there, or so it seemed.

At a cross roads yet again, led by the aching of my soul, to find and to Be Found. My heart was shattered glass within me, I bled inside, and there was no Healer. And yet I knew. If I desperately searched, surely, somehow, someway I would find You. For I knew.

Seventeen. Reaching out for meaning. Being led and not seeing. Seeking to live in the depths of now, and yet so wounded. Trying to hold myself together in a fantasy. Trying to walk away from the pain. Inside, eleven, twelve, frozen in trauma and a child’s helpless sorrow. Where were you? Where are you now? I bleed. I bleed.

Is this the mid point? I saw You, I cried out for You, not Who or What anymore, but You and You came to me, rescued me, and are healing me. I belong to You and to no other.

Who is there in heaven but You? There is none that I desire, but *You*.

Your blood is that scarlet ribbon that ties me to You. Only in looking back can I trace the echoes of Your grace, the handprints of Your love, and the broken bread crumbs of Your Sacrifice, scattered along my path, hidden in darkness yet present each and every day.

If I am lost, it is in Your certainty. I do not know the path ahead, or how to heal what has been wounded. But You Are The Path. The Way that’s found me.

You trace the deepest caverns of my soul. And there, You Love me. Endlessly.

 

Daily Photo #3

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Of Pebbles & Pearls…

Daily Prompt – Buff

You dreamed of a life graced with the calm simplicity of a Kinkade painting. One in which sunbeams would dance and float upon the stream that gently carried you through your days.

“Row, row, row your boat….”

And perhaps that is how your voyage began, once upon a time, in simpler days. Leaves fluttered and fell and were caught upstream. And Thumbelina and Tom Thumb sat cradled upon one of those leaves, waving to you happily as they drifted gently by.

“Gently down the stream…”

I can see you there.  Your delicate hand upon the rough bark of that old oak tree. Watching. Waiting. Hoping. Praying….

A stray piece of driftwood bobs by and out of sight.

“Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily…”

You cannot stand on the shore forever. There is too much adventure in your heart to let your timidity be the rope that tethers you and holds you back. And so you build for yourself a boat, and set sail gently down that playful stream.

“Life is but a Dream!”

Only your stream refuses to remain calm and playful, and the tides turn.

“Life on the ocean waves!”

Water crashes against the rocks of your life. You are thrown overboard. Seaweed strewn, a straggler to the shore, you are water laden, and carrying lessons heavier than the rocks.

But the pebbles around you are buff and beautiful. Years of being battered by harsh waves have made them so.  And you reach down into the rock-pools for a starfish, but find an oyster shell instead. The harsh grinding of grit and grain has birthed a gleaming pearl inside, that you know.

You are overwhelmed. In the distance you see a lighthouse, and from it the only Light you need. Overwhelmed with joyous defiance or defiant joy, you are not sure. Drenched with the fresh water of life as waterfalls find you. Buffeted, yet gloriously you shine, a sweet reflection of that Greater Light, with a depth and a smoothness that that gentler stream could never bring out in you.

This storm has passed. You are Alive!

Text copyright (c).

Photos courtesy of Google images.

 

 

 

 

Daily Photo #2

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Adult Colouring in & Mindfulness

Time Garden – DS

Time Garden – DS

Secret Garden – JB

Secret Garden – JB

 

As someone who struggles with anxiety and panic attacks, amongst other things, the dream of living fully is offset by the daily reality of having to manage the practicalities of these health conditions.

However, I have found a huge health benefit in the practice of adult colouring in. I realise that some people find the concept bizarre and even laughable, yet before you ‘turn the page’ if you are currently of that opinion, might I entice you to stick around for a while by telling you that I have found it immensely beneficial on a number of levels?

Anxiety and severe anxiety and depression are very difficult conditions to manage.  Sufferers find that their minds and bodies are on a constant ‘fight, flight or freeze’ response. It is hard to calm the breathing, the nervous system, and at times this can even manifest as intense physical pain.

It has taken time, but I have found that the creative and ‘analogue’ outlet of colouring in has been beautifully therapeutic. When you colour you are more ‘present’ in the moment, your breathing slows and racing thoughts slowly settle on observing the image in front of you, thinking about colour choices, feeling the texture of the pen or pencil against the grain of the paper. Added to that, there is a satisfaction of having collaborated in creating something, adding life and colour to the artist’s beautiful illustrations.

The above images are pictures that I have coloured from the beautiful artwork of Johanna Basford’s ‘Secret Garden’, and Daria Song’s ‘The Time Garden’. Both of these illustrators are accomplished and bring their own sense of wonder to their pages. Johanna Basford is a great advocate of the idea of ‘collaboration’ between the illustrator and the ‘colourist’.

I personally find the world of adult colouring in a vibrant, enchanting and healing place to dwell.

Where you are right now…

may not be where you wish to be.  The daydreams of your youth seem to have faded now into obscurity.  You have already learned so much, and this is your journey.

So take a breath, take time, not to worry about the stretch of road ahead of you that seems so arduous, but take the time just to be.

And know that you are important, you are loved and you are enough, as you are. Right now. In this moment.

Take time to consider the blessings you already have. Know that you are not alone and that other travellers will meet with you along life’s often confusing or difficult way.

Take heart. Have courage. Have faith. Enjoy this moment. Just be.

 

Through arid flatlands of the heart

Detonate – Daily Prompt

Through arid flatlands of the heart, an innocent traverses.

She cradles a bud, fragile, explosive.

Unrelenting flames close in, anguished cries, and burning dreams

Explode around her.

Torn around her, faces of strangers, and those she held dear.

A city, a world explodes and crumbles with hate.

She holds in her palm, a bud, more powerful.

It is Love.

It is her time to detonate.  (c)

 

Random Acts of Kindness ~ an inspiring thought for the day…

Picture courtesy of Google Images.

Kindness: noun: kindness

1. the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate.

   “he thanked them for their kindness and support”

   synonyms:

   kindliness, kind-heartedness, warm-heartedness, tender-heartedness, goodwill, affectionateness, affection, warmth, gentleness, tenderness, concern, care;

Source: Google.

The novelist, Henry James, once said: “Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind.”

The importance of kindness cannot be understated. Nor can it’s power to impact another’s life be underestimated.

You may be familiar with the film ‘Pay It Forward’, in which when a class was asked by their social studies teacher to come up with an idea that will have a positive impact on the world, one little boy, Trevor comes up with the idea of ‘paying it forward’. To pay it forward would mean that if someone does something good for you, instead of ‘paying them back’, you would ‘pay it forward’ to three more people and they in turn would do the same.  A central premise, however, is that the act of kindness would have to be something of significance that the recipient couldn’t do or achieve for themselves.

I think this is a wonderful idea. However, I think acts of kindness don’t have to be ‘big’ or of monumental significance to have a deep and lasting impact on others and ourselves.

In thinking of the idea of ‘RAKs’ or Random Acts of Kindness, I have come to the conclusion that ‘random’ doesn’t need to mean unplanned.

We can have it in our minds and hearts that we will do something for someone even if we don’t know for whom or at what time in the day or week that might be. For example, buying a sandwich or a bottle of water and keeping it ready to give to a homeless person that we might come across.

There are so many ways we can inspire each other to be kind, and to extend that kindness beyond ourselves and our own circle of friends and contacts.

Think about a kindness someone has shown to you. No matter how small. Think about how that made you feel, and don’t underestimate the power of the gift of kindness that you hold in your own hands to give to another.

I remember in school, I had been bullied and was very introverted, shy and had little self esteem. I felt in many ways, dehumanised. Years passed and in my final year of school someone showed me kindness. Not with any monumental act or deed, but in simply taking the time to show that they cared, that I was worth listening to, and getting to know.

It was a real shock to my system, for although I had by that time managed to make a few ‘friends’ I had never before felt that anyone in school actually *cared*. The kindness was quiet, yet palpable. I didn’t know how to accept that someone would want to be kind to me.

And yet, a small gesture ultimately set the wheels in motion for my heart to soften, learn to trust and for my life to change.

My heart is open to giving kindness to others. We may never realise the impact that even a small act of kindness may make not just in someone’s day, but on the trajectory of their whole life. Isn’t that in itself miraculous?

I’d like to encourage you to think about kindness today. How you can be kinder to yourself and to other people. What could you do to reach out or to reconnect?

Here are a few ideas to get you started. And don’t forget to ‘pay it forward’ 🙂 With love, x.

1. Reach out to a friend that you haven’t connected with for a while.
2. Write a letter to tell someone that you care.
3. Give a homeless person a drink or some food.
4. Write a random note or a postcard to encourage someone and leave it in a library book, in a coffee shop, or somewhere that someone you don’t know will find it.
5. Tell someone they are wonderful, today.
6. Be aware of the people around you and whether they need help – the old adage about helping ‘grannies’ across the street, isn’t such a bad one 🙂
7. Inspire yourself by making your own list of ‘random acts of kindness’ that you can plan to do in the coming month.

Daily Photo #1

Simply adorable, don’t you think? 🙂

 

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