Category Archives: Faith

Giving yourself permission to move on after pain…

Pain may have marked and marred your life for a long time. It may have cut so deep into your soul that it crippled you and in a way defined you for a very long time. Pain can run very deep especially if we’ve experienced it in childhood during formative and sensitive years. What if your soul has been deeply wounded and your mind shackled, but you’ve pressed on, survived trauma, pushed through and found healing?

Has pain and what happened to you or what you experienced become so fundamental to how you think of yourself and your life that even if you have healed from much of it you find it difficult to think of yourself in a new way or give yourself permission to move on from it?

It can be a challenge to our thinking to allow ourselves to live in the new found freedom we’ve craved for so long. I have been through years of deep inner pain, and yet now I am stepping into a new freedom and inner healing as the balm of God’s healing love and Holy Spirit heals and renews me from the inside out. Yet there are reminders of the things that I went through. But I have a new identity. I no longer need to be defined or crippled by pain or fear. It has been something I’ve spent many many years having to work through and overcome, but now what?

We can begin to use our pain to help others, but what about getting to the stage of completely letting go? I believe those deep soul wounds can only be fully healed by Jesus, even though on our own we can make progress, it doesn’t go to the deepest part of us.

What about living in transformation from victim to victor? Overcome to overcomer? This can take time and shifting our mindset and the things we tell ourselves daily and getting stronger.

I think I’m ready to move forwards, those deep wounds were a pivotal part of my life story and journey, ones that at the time I would never have wanted to go through or experience because they cut so deep, but Jesus Christ’s death and resurrection is far, far greater than that, and God can use the painful things in our life for greater good if we let Him, even if that seems to take a lifetime.

Have you gone through a transformative life experience that was marked by pain and suffering and brokenness? Have you worked hard to heal? Can you give yourself permission to let go and move forwards, using what happened to you to propel you into a brighter future where you can walk in freedom and help other people? Sometimes we go back and forth on these psychological bridges, sometimes we heal a bit and march forwards and then have to slow down and do some more deep healing. But perhaps there comes a time when we can say, that was then and this is now, and now is completely NEW. Now that is a psychological bridge worth crossing over once the raw emotions have healed.

Are you in a place where you can move forwards, even if that doesn’t mean a change in circumstances but just a change within yourself? What’s stopping you? Life is full of transitions, and thankfully, healing can be part of that no matter what has gone before. Give yourself permission to live, to thrive, or to do the hard and painful work of getting there, if need be.

I think of the glory of the Cross, the agonising suffering that Jesus Christ went through for me, and the Glory that He Is in now. If my life is hidden with Christ in God, then surely I can embrace the new, because He has won the victory for me, and His Touch brings the deep healing my soul needs, even if He unravels us from that hurt and pain over time, if we let Him, He will make us free! ❤ Praise be to God. I can be free because of what He did and does for me. By His wounds we are healed. Ask Him, receive from Him, He won’t let you down, even if it is tough to start with, He will see you through.

Take care. Stay safe and strong. x

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Have you tried praying?

Seriously, in this world we often try finding solace and distraction in so many things.

In this world, as troubled as it is, it can be easy to buy into the lie that God Is not real or that He does not care. Truth be told there is evil in this world and we are in a spiritual battle whether or not you want to believe it. Just because you don’t believe something doesn’t mean it is not real.

There is a lot that we can’t understand or explain, and yet if you are willing to try all the things you are trying in life, why don’t you try praying? There Is a God, The Living God, Jesus Christ, and you only need to call out to Him from the heart.

Life can get difficult, but it makes all the difference to have Someone there Who Loves you to walk you through it and lead you to a better world to come.

Try praying. He already knows that you’d be here and reading this, and deeply wants to hear from you and be there for you in a way no one else can. We are spiritual beings and praying to God, to Jesus Christ, Is a way to connect us to the very Source of Life. ❤ x

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Something has changed…

I wrote previously about being in different seasons of life. For a long time I had felt that I was in a season marked by suffering, then by recovery, and then overcoming (including overcoming anxiety).

Something has changed. Within me. It is almost as if the fear and anxiety has been ‘switched off’, overnight.

I had been calling out to God, I think perhaps a few months ago. Certain things felt difficult to manage within myself, some things felt like they were causing anxiety and doubt. I had very profound experiences when I first encountered Christ, but those few months ago I felt distant, dry, and I didn’t want to just be ‘going through the motions’ when I know His Love Is real, tangible, something I have profoundly experienced before.

I cried out to Him and He has answered me. I have been experiencing once again Pure Comfort, Love, His Peaceful Presence, within me and around me as I draw near to Him especially in prayer.

He has been communicating in different ways, showing me things that He has also similarly shown to a Christian friend. I am certain the ‘flow’ of these recent ‘coincidences’ are not coincidences.

Something within has changed, and there is a shift in gears, in perspective and a Peace that I had struggled to find for a long time as I recovered from and wrestled with various things I had gone through.

I am trusting this change is not a momentary one, but something deeper, longer lasting. I know my mindset may change in more gradual ways perhaps, as I step more fully into this Reality of who I truly am.

I love how God Is always reaching out to us, teaching us, and sometimes those breakthroughs are so gentle yet profound. When we stumble, those who Know Jesus as the Reality that He Is, His real and tangible Presence….He will still be leading us, helping us, as The Good Shepherd, The Living God.

In this world of trouble, He speaks Peace. The Peace that comes from being Forgiven, Cleansed, made New inside. Peace, real tangible Peace in Christ, through His Blood shed at the Cross. x

Today let us each learn to step out, however small that step may be, into something New.

Shifting gears…

Sometimes in life we are very aware of the nature of the ‘season’ we are in. It may, for example, be one of searching for answers, for Truth. It may be one of suffering, in health or circumstances or at the hands of others. It may be one of deep emotional, psychological, physical or mental pain. It may be one of distress such as when a child is bullied and ends up hating themselves. It may be one of survival. It may be one of recovery. It may be one of yearning. It may be one of gain or loss. It may be a season of self discovery, of discovering our gifts or talents, our true identity, it may be one of stepping out in faith or adventure, of friendship, of new beginnings, of new people in our lives. It may be one of struggling against all the odds, of survival, of trauma, of recovery, of post-traumatic growth, of becoming established. It may be one of waiting. It may be one of peace.

Seldom do people spend their entire lives in a season characterised by just one of these elements. Many of us go through suffering or pain. I certainly have. And yet, many of us go on to find healing. Many stay in the process of ‘recovery’ and never quite ‘shift gears’ to embrace something more whole, new or strong and purposeful.

I began this blog at a time of ‘recovery’ from many things that had crushed my heart and soul over many years. They may be different to the things in life you have suffered from, but cumulatively, the things I experienced over time all built up and reached somewhat of a ‘bursting point’ when the pain had to overflow and spill out in tears and in seeking out help and healing. It was a tough time, but it also signified a shifting of gears from in a sense surviving difficult feelings and thoughts and bottling them up to processing them in a form of reliving difficult things from in particular childhood bullying and spiritual attacks and all the various heart hurts and disappointments of going through life in this world in a kind of post-traumatic growth.

Well, this blog began as a shifting of gears in a sense from being someone needing help to seeking to help others by using this platform to write, to share, to help. Now I believe I am shifting gears again, and perhaps some of you are too.

I think the pandemic, the coronavirus and various lockdowns have changed us in many ways. I’ve been able to help other people by writing about tools and techniques to overcome anxiety, to help people with depression and to share faith. I have come to a place of healing as well and from crying out to God, I am more aware of His tangible Presence and Peace and I believe He Is building me up on the inside to trust Him, to take things as they come, and to look forwards and upward to the Sure Hope I have in Christ beyond this earth and body. Many people will be re-evaluating their lives, how they spend their time, what is important. People will be exploring what they think about life and death and after death. Some people take comfort in the idea that there may not be anything after this. I take comfort for myself in the Truth I have experienced that those in Christ Jesus have a glorious future to look forward to. If you’re not sure, now is the time to repent and to call upon His Name and know God’s indescribable Love that Is so Comforting, Peaceful, Pure, Real and True…not religion, but Real Love. I believe Jesus Christ Is the only Way.

I think those who know and love Him are being called to shift gears too. To allow Him to heal us, to build us up, to set us free, and to grow strong in that Love relationship which is quite real. So that we can use our gifts to reach out, even if by way of a computer screen, to help others. To know the spiritual gifts we have in prayer and intercession and encouraging others and share the Truth of Jesus Christ as we learn to know Him better, not as someone we’ve merely read about, but to experience Him for ourselves, and walk in that. Little by little, day by day.

Perhaps this is a season for you to shift gears too. Perhaps you like me have also spent many years of suffering whether inwardly with pain or circumstances, of battling to get strong, and maybe now is your time to *be* strong and to step out and in that. If you are in Christ Jesus, you *are* a New Creation. This is a spiritual reality and you may have experienced this in various ways. Sometimes we have to ‘plod on’ in faithfulness without seeing or experiencing growth in very obvious ways, but then at other times our seasons change and we are no longer those fearful creatures shackled by chains of fear, of the past or of struggle and suffering although these are parts of life. We learn to look up, we learn to draw on that Pure Love and Sure Hope and stay connected to Him and even if our outward lives might look ‘weak or foolish’ to the world, our spiritual lives can blossom as we know His Love, rest in it, and intercede for a world that is blind and lost without Him.

Maybe you are not a believer but this is a season of shifting gears in your life. Maybe you have something to accomplish, or do or figure out. We all know, especially in these days, that time is short. Maybe that will be the nudge that helps to get us in gear and live out the rest of our lives in a new way. God bless. x

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Encourage Each Other…

There is power in encouragement. Even the smallest gesture can make a real difference to someone. You might not realise what that difference is, but if you can, where you can, by whatever means you can, encourage other people, and better still ‘each other’ in mutual encouragement.

I’m a follower of Christ Jesus (since He Illuminated my life in a very powerful way when I called upon Him 18 years ago, and He has been tangibly present in my life ever since, despite occasions when I’ve not experienced His Love or Presence as closely. I am so grateful to be experiencing His Love and Peace and Presence and inner healing more keenly these days, and the comfort of His Spirit, despite the ongoing challenges of being human!). He Is Real – the Living God, and I pray you will one day call upon His Name in repentance and experience His Saving Grace and the Reality of the Greatest, Purest Love you can ever know. Without repentance there is no forgiveness of sin, yet when we do repent, turn to Him and accept this incredible, free gift of Grace from what the Lord Jesus accomplished through His Blood shed at the Cross, our slate is wiped clean, we are indwelt by the Holy Spirit and made new from the inside, and saved from all that our sin deserves. Incredible.

As Christians, we are commanded to “encourage one another” (Hebrews 10), to build each other up (Romans 15:2), to “encourage one another and build each other up…” (1 Thessalonians 5:11), to “bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2) and we are told that “love is the most excellent way” (1 Corinthians 12:31).

Many people underestimate the power of encouragement. It could perhaps turn someone’s life around. Maybe you’ve been in a painful place and people started treating you with worth and kindness and it seemed radical to you! I’ve been there. The Love of God can change us. Perhaps someone has been having difficult thoughts and feeling unworthy of life, and an act of encouragement, of kindness and love might just impact their life path.

Many people fail to realise that we are also in an intensely fierce spiritual battle. There are things going on around us in the unseen realm that born again Christians, like myself, have experienced. These aren’t thoughts, or hallucinations or mental illnesses, but there are real, tangible spiritual forces of darkness, influencing our lives, and there are also spiritual beings of light. There is a war going on for people’s souls, and Jesus Christ Is the Only Saviour. This is not fiction, nor a story book or an overactive imagination. I have experienced so many things that I didn’t know at the time were in the Bible, but there is a real battle in the unseen realms, not just human action but spiritual realities of good and evil, having an influence on what happening around us.

For Christians, prayer is therefore so important, to call upon The Living God. Read the book of Job in the Old Testament. I’ve had some experiences that made me feel a lot like Job at the time. We find it hard to understand sometimes why God allows certain things to take place, but although we don’t have all the answers now, we do have the directives of how to respond, in faith, in prayer, in love and waging ‘war’ in the unseen spiritual realm through faithful prayer, fasting, connection with The Living God, using the Word of God in our lives and renewing our minds, helping and caring for each other, etc.

Anyone, whether or not you know Christ personally, can gain from encouragement, although ultimately your only true hope can be found in Him, the Door to Salvation, the only One Who can save you from an eternity apart from Him, or a life on earth now apart from His tangible love and indwelling Spirit.

Our minds are constantly bombarded by negative messages in this world. We are tempted constantly to fear, worry, anxiety, and I don’t think there are many people nowadays who are immune to these, sometimes overwhelming, thoughts and feelings. We all need encouragement, and we all need to give it too. This is one way we can ‘strengthen the brethren’ and also a way in which we can show care and kindness to anyone.

I hope you have found something of worth in this message. Encourage someone in your life today – you never know what difference it might make, to them and to you. x

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What are we all Searching for? ….

With currently still working from home, I have a bit of time in my evenings after work to do some de-cluttering.

I’ve been organising and clearing out some paperwork, and going through some of my school and university notes (yes, I’m one of those people who finds it hard to throw away those years of hard work! 🙂 ). It’s really interesting to see how I loved literature both in school and in my undergraduate degree (I did human rights, gender studies and international development for my postgrad degree), and wanted to be a writer.

I guess in some ways, blogging is one of my outlets for regular ‘writing’. I’ve written an allegorical novel based on some of my life and faith experiences, and now it is sitting on my computer, and I’m wondering and praying what to do with it next….?

I think of that stage in life that teenagers pass through when it feels like their whole future is ahead of them, and that it is the time when dreams are beginning to take shape as they think of what they will ‘become’ in life.

I think many people long for significance, they long to ‘make a name’ for themselves, and maybe at one point in my teenage years I did too….we all want to leave a legacy or to be important in some way. As life stages change and we realise more about the world and how easily and quickly things and people become forgotten with the sands of time, perhaps some of us begin to ‘let go’ gracefully of the things we once thought were important.

I think that desire for immortality is deep within us all. For me, I realise now that the significance we are all really searching for is that Deep, Pure and Perfect Love and Satisfaction that can only come from The One Who formed us.

Many people like to throw around arguments of how those who talk about Christ are deluded, unscientific, illogical or blinded. But the fact is that He Is Real, and His LOVE, His Pure and Perfect Love is tangible, it is real and it is the most comforting and beautiful thing any human being could ever hope for. Those who know this reality for themselves can gradually begin to ‘let go’ of those false comforts, of the sense of having to ‘make’ or prove ourselves to be significant because the reality of that significance is found in being Perfectly Loved by Him. I wish I had the words to describe His Presence, but I don’t. I just know that it is in Him all our longings are ultimately fulfilled, and I know that in His real and tangible love it all makes sense, and even as the world fades away, even if our lives ebb away and are forgotten, in Him, and only in Him is true Life…now, and in the life that is to come. When you encounter Him, and one day you will….all your arguments will fall away…..I am so thankful that He rescued me and gave me sight to realise He Is the Living God, to repent and choose Him and to know and experience this Perfect, unfailing and incomparable love.

In Him, let all your strivings cease and let your heart and soul be filled up and satisfied with His Love and Comfort and Goodness. There Is no experience in all of earth like this Pure Love ❤ I pray you find it.

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Deep, deep Love….

‘Oh, the deep deep love of Jesus, vast unmeasured, boundless free…’

You may know this old hymn, the lyrics are beautiful. When I was first ‘saved’, I was absolutely flooded with the Love, Peace, Comfort and joy of God’s Spirit. It cost God so much, yet takes so little for us to repent, to ask forgiveness, and to call out to Him in Faith. This Love was the most amazing feeling I have ever experienced, yet I also experienced a spiritual battle with darkness. We will have trouble in this fallen world, where there is evil, and a lot of things seem to not make sense, yet God Is real and His Love is real….and He will work everything out despite the mess and chaos of a fallen and broken world.

I have been drawing near to God recently, and I have asked Him that I don’t want to just ‘go through the motions’ of singing songs, or professing faith without that deep closeness with Him. Despite my worries, fears, sin and imperfection, He has been answering, and renewing me from within. God allowed a season of feeling ‘distant’ from Him and being faced with questions, and I have called out to Him and found Him Real and Faithful.

Despite the trouble we face on this earth, and from our very own natures, there is nothing that compares with that Real, Tangible, sweet comfort and presence of God’s Spirit within us, holding us. There Is no purer love than this. It is not something that can be imagined, thought up or dreamt of – you need to come into that relationship of Love yourself, being made a new creation, and experiencing the reality of His Sweet Presence for yourself. There is nothing that can compare. I hope and pray that He will draw you to repentance so that you can ask Him into your life, to be forgiven and experience this everlasting, deep, pure love for yourself. x

He Is Real. His Love Is Real. Ask Him. ❤

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‘Open Doors’ – Christians in Sudan, and a call to prayer. <3

Today, Open Doors, the Christian charity serving the persecuted church and highlighting some of the suffering going on in the world, shared this update about Christians in Sudan, and a call to fellow Spirit-filled believers to pray for those in need.

I hope you find this helpful, God bless you for praying. ❤

https://www.opendoorsuk.org/news/latest-news/sudan-military-coup/

Changes from within…

If you’ve ever had an encounter with the Living God, with Jesus Christ, then you know what it is to be changed from within. When we are flooded with Life from His Spirit, we are made ‘new Creations’. This is so much more than words, and there are testimonies of staunch atheists who tried logically to defy the reality of the Living God, but who after being touched by the Reality of Him had to admit that He Is Real. There’s a whole lot to be said about that, and many might argue that unless you can test and prove things empirically then they can’t possibly be true, but if you have encountered the Living God then you’ll know that there is a reality that can be experienced and felt and that changes you from within. There is a tangible supernatural reality that goes beyond brain states that is real whether or not people choose to accept that reality.

If you’ve experienced the power of the Living God in your own life, then you will know something of the transformative Peace, Love, Joy and Power of His Spirit. Some people experience radical transformations over night, some people come to realise the reality of the spiritual battle that we are in, and some are flooded with His Love.

But there is a process here as well. Even after we are indwelt by His Spirit, set apart and given His Righteousness when we are made His, there is still a process of change that occurs from within, and sometimes this can be a slow process, for others you can see the changes more markedly, not as something they are doing, but the natural changes that God brings about, remaking someone from within so that they are marked more by His Love and Purity.

A lot of this would seem as ‘nonsense’ to someone who has never known the Reality of the Living God in their life, but for those of you who do, be encouraged that He Loves you and Is changing you, even if those changes seem to take a long time. That’s because even after we are forgiven and given His Righteousness, a supernatural state of being made right with God, and being indwelt by His Spirit, even after such an incredible Reality takes place, there are still deep things within us that need to be cleansed and put right.

I’ve been drawing closer to God, in prayer, experiencing more of the reality of the Love and Presence of His Spirit within me, but at the same time, God is ‘unearthing’ things in my heart that I need to bring to Him to allow Him to change and forgive and free me from. Yet the more we allow this sometimes difficult process (‘sanctification’) to take place, the more we will be able to let God’s Spirit make us new from within.

These are incredible truths, realities that that world does not accept or see, because a world that loves darkness prefers to deny the reality of our own sinfulness. But to humble ourselves and reach out in faith and accept His Forgiveness is the gateway to the Real experience of His tangible Pure and Perfect Love.

If you are on this road, and know from the reality of your own experience what I’m talking about, don’t be discouraged if you are made to face the things in yourself that need to be changed, forgiven and cleansed – bring it to Him and allow His Love to free and cleanse you from within. He Is Faithful, and there Is no Love like His, and if you know Him you know this Reality is far more than mere words. x

Peace and Love beyond words…

I have a tendency at times to be a bit of a worrier. However, there is a Peace and a Love in Christ that is beyond words, and I have been experiencing it again, and I am so grateful for how Real and tangible and present His Love Is – with a purity and cleanness and joy like nothing else.

I used to think Christians were a bit strange, I used to think of myself as morally ‘pretty good’, and a spiritual person, a Truth seeker. An encounter with Jesus Christ showed me that He Is The Truth, and I was absolutely flooded with Love and Joy and the Pure Clean Presence of His Spirit. I realised that for years of my life I had actually been taking in lies, chained by darkness, and had missed the Living God, but He had mercy on me.

Light shows up darkness. We all think we’re ‘pretty good’ until Perfect Light shows that within us is a darkness and wretchedness and that we need forgiveness. Maybe that sounds a bit hard to take in, but if you can, if you do admit to yourself and to God that you are a sinner, Whom He Loved and gave His Life for at the Cross, and receive His Forgiveness then a transformation does take place within – when you repent, and believe in Jesus Christ crucified and raised from the dead and call upon his Name – things become supernaturally Real.

Even if the people around you do not see it, you will know. And even if you are a worrier, even though we are sinners, the Love and Peace and Purity that will flood your soul will Hold you.

I am experiencing the Pure Love and Peace of His Presence again. I am thankful that when we are called to stand before Him, I will be able to stand covered in His Light and Pure, exquisite, incomparable Love, and not ashamed by my own darkness.

x